There's a moment in your fifties when it suddenly might dawn on your that your life is not your own, and you are not the woman you had thought or hoped you'd be by now.   You look around and wonder where is that young woman, with all her dreams and wishes?  Over the years how did I lose her?

It mightn't be loud or dramatic, but there can be the mere faintest of a whisper beneath the surface that hints at your life not being what you had dreamed of, and the hope of there being more for you.  

It may sound something like this:
“I feel that there should be more for me at this time in my life.  But somehow I no longer feel like Me!  I want different things for my life, more authentic to the real me, but I just can’t seem to reach them".

But here’s the part that really matters: this moment has almost nothing to do with a lack of ability.  It’s not about skills, intelligence, qualifications, or talent - it’s rarely just about confidence.  More often than not it is about the language we've been using to ourselves and how that has been holding us back from being who we really want to be...

Our dreams might be in our heads and in our hearts, but our sabotages can be there too.

The inner language you’ve been using for years, without realising it, has been having a considerable impact on what you've materialised in your life.  The words you whisper to yourself in the moments when no one else can hear have an incredible influence, just as much as the words you speak out loud.   Even if you are still proud of the life you have created - your children; your career; how you have cared for others - this still doesn't mean you don't deserve something else, something new, as you reach the middle of your life.

Reaching our 50's has a way of bringing this inner language into sharper focus, our life experiences can shape our midlife for better, or for worse, depending on how we approach the memory of them.   We can start seeing the gap between what we say we want and what we think we believe we are allowed to have - and that gap isn’t closed just by more motivation or pushing harder.

The gap is closed by shifting back into our more authentic true selves. 

It's closed by the new thoughts we repeat in our heads. 
It's closed by the new language we use to describe who we are, who we’re allowed to be, and what we believe is still possible for us.

This is not a fluffy version of a make believe mindset, this is the grounded, real version of what you want for yourself in the next stage of your life — the kind of life that changes how you show up every single day for yourself. 

The way we talk to ourselves isn't just a commentary, it's the materialisation of true feeling.   

It's a script for your life to follow - 

What Script have you been following thus far?

The Hidden Script Most Midlife Women Don’t Hear Themselves Saying

By the time you reach your fifties, you will also have lived through decades of internal and external conditioning that will have been quietly shaping the automatic thoughts in your head and the how you vocalise them.  

Phrases like:

• “What if I make a mistake"
• “Am I too old to start again”
• “I don’t want to make a fool of myself”
• “I need to be realistic”
• “I don’t have enough hours in the day”

These kind of thoughts sound harmless, almost sensible or "realistic".   But they establish your emotional state, and your emotional state is what shapes your behaviour and what you attract into your life.

This is something I teach in Step 4 of my True Woman Rising Pathway:

“Your thoughts influence your emotions. Your emotions influence your actions.  And your actions ultimately shape your results"

Most women don’t realise that their inner dialogue was formed long before they had the wisdom, experience, or self-awareness they have now.  They’re still speaking to themselves using language from a version of them that no longer exists, or a version of themselves that has been moulded by a society that expects them to shrink, settle, be grateful, or stay quiet.

Midlife is the first time that many women stop long enough to listen more critically to these scripts - Is this the point where you can start listening to yours?

Because when you do it is a chance to recognise one simple truth:

The voice you've been listening for so long is now is outdated.

Language Is Not About Confidence - It’s About Authenticity

One of the biggest misunderstandings in personal development is the belief that just thinking better thoughts can magically make you more confident.

But this is slightly backwards....

Your thoughts don’t create confidence on their own, there needs to be feeling and authenticity behind them to ingrain that confidence.

So finding that authenticity helps to build that feeling, and from that identity of your dreams you can then shape the language you use every day in building your successes.

In the "Living As If " section of my Pathway, I teach:

“Authenticity shifts first. Results follow. You begin stepping into the woman you want to become when you start speaking like her, and thinking like her”

This is where the shift happens - not in generic affirmations, and not in pretending everything is fine.  Not in forcing some imaginary positivity, but in choosing the right language that reflects the woman you are becoming - not the one you’ve outgrown.

For example:

“I’m not good at.......”
keeps you powerless

“I’m learning what I need for my next chapter”
puts you in motion

“I’m stuck.....”
closes your options

“I’m moving forward and facing the challenges of change”
opens them

“I’ve wasted too much time....”
creates shame and stillness

“I’m ready to try daily and succeed over time”
creates momentum and hope.

These aren’t just nicer sentences, they are statements of intent.

Why Midlife Is the Perfect Time to Rewrite Your Inner Language

When you reach your 50's you are in a unique and powerful chapter of your life.  You’ve lived enough, seen enough, survived enough, and grown enough to know what matters  to you - and what doesn’t.

But you still have to teach yourself that you no longer need validation, permission, or external approval to do the things you really want to do. 

What stops women in midlife isn’t a lack of courage - it’s the old internal language.  But that language was never likely to have been yours - it was absorbed by others opinions or expectations of who you should be, or imposed by culture, workplace dynamics, family roles, or decades of putting everyone else first.

Midlife reinvention doesn’t require you to become a new person - It just invites you to become your truest self, the woman who’s been buried under years of responsibility, conditioning, and being needed by everyone but yourself.

And you reach her through the words you choose now.

This Isn’t Just About Positive Thinking

This distinction is REALLY important - especially when you are a grown woman, and we have little patience for fluffy phrases or surface-level advice.

Positive thinking on the surface tries to plaster over the fear by reciting positive phrases without feeling.  
You achieve true Positivity when you acknowledges the fears, honour them, and then choose language that creates forward movement in your positivity, because it comes from the heart.

- It's grounded.
- It’s grown up. 
- And it’s emotionally honest.
It’s the missing piece, so when you choose to think differently you create a clean emotional state - one that gives you access to clarity, possibility, and the ability to make decisions from strength rather than fear.

So Where Do You Start?

Not with tips or a checklist.

But with awareness.

Ask yourself:

• “Which phrases do I repeat that dim my energy or shrink my potential?”
• “Which thoughts still come from the woman I used to be — not the woman I want to be?”
• “What would I say if I believed my next chapter could be truly aligned and fulfilling for me personally?”

Your answers won’t be neat or perfect.

They don’t need to be.

This isn’t about forcing yourself into a new mindset.

It’s about gently noticing the language that no longer fits — and then choosing to reprogram them. 

This Is the Turning Point

One of the most powerful ideas I share inside True Woman Rising is:

“When a midlife woman chooses a new thought, she isn’t just changing a sentence — she’s rewriting her trajectory for the future"

That is the time for real transformation.

Start to listen more consciously to every thought, to every word that comes out of your mouth... Focus more on clean and conscious language that aligns with the life you want, and the woman you’re ready to be. 

Because now you have the clarity to see the script you’ve been living with — be determined to write a new one.

That new script begins with the words you choose today - and from that script comes you new self and your more authentic midlife..

Marie

x